Skinny jean requirements are skinny calves and skinny thighs. What the fox was I thinking when I bought a pair at H&M in Vegas? I must have been drunk when I made my purchase.
Sadly, I put them on to wear to work this morning. I pulled them over my calves with a few tugs then easily over my knees and then the struggle between good and evil ensued. I hurt my fingers gripping and pulling them over my thighs. Zipped up and buttoned, I did runner's lunges, sumo squats, toe touches and high kicks to try to make these nightmare jeans more comfy around my legs. Nothing worked. I felt claustrophobic and when I looked down at my calves it was obvious they were claustrophobic too. The seams where pulling apart! I was disappointed, frustrated and angry. I was pretty sure I was turning into the Hulk and any second the jeans were going to bust and only leave me in hideous cutoffs. I then decided that I couldn't wear these jeans to work for the safety of my coworkers.
Two life lessons learned:
1. Never shop drunk.
2. Never wear skinny jeans...ever.
No comments:
Post a Comment